So this afternoon we went to a house church here in Mae Sot. This house church was what most of my friends would know as "small group"; although here it is all the church consists of. It was such a special moment for me to be seated around somebody's living room, talk about our week, open the word, and share and pray. We even got a piece of hot apple crisp with ice cream at the end....not to mention the sweet tea! :-)
We took communion together and as I sat there in prayer/thought a realization hit me that we are here together because of what He did on the cross. The only reason we had "family" around us on the other side of the world is because of what Christ did for us. We wouldn't be sitting in a strangers living room with people we didn't know and feel the love of God if Christ didn't die on the cross. He provided it all for us.
Living out of a backpack for the last 2 and half months and moving from place to place disconnects you a little from feeling that intimidate connection with people. I didn't realize how much I missed my small group and having people around me, in person, to lift me up. God reminded me that it is all of gift from Him. With out Him I wouldn't be standing in Thailand. I wouldn't be waiting for some new friends to come to the hotel to meet us for dinner. With out Him I couldn't do what I am doing.
It seems like when I think of the cross I think of the saving power of Christ's blood that saved me from a life with out Him. An eternity with out Him. It gives me freedom and strength...but I never thought of it as giving me a family no matter where I am in the world. A precious moment to see that God's gift of the cross is even sweeter than before!!!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
It all means nothing...
It'd been a slow few weeks - we had little to do and were beginning to wonder why our contacts were falling through. Our nerves were getting tired of entertaining ourselves with random things to do yet not being able to do much because our tight budget didn't leave much left over. We roamed the streets and took in the sights as best we could; hoping our friends would contact us soon giving us something to do.
It didn't occur to me that perhaps this was exactly the spare moment we needed for God to teach us something. One morning I read for a long time and then prayed for a long time. It was one of those great moments were every verse comes alive and you know what you want to pray for. Impressed after sometime I took my ipod and went on a walk. I didn't know where to go - our area is filled with westerns and I wanted to get away and listen to some praise and worship while walking. I've been deeply longing that here but usually there is no place to hide away or it's not safe to venture alone. I started off in a direction I hadn't been before.
I walked along the street with out my ipod so I could listen to the sounds and make sure I didn't get hit while crossing the street. I found myself in the mist of allie ways filled with "old women" clothing. What I mean by that is fancy clothes old Thai women wear that look like it's from the late 80s. I felt compelled to pray that a church would rise up in that area (partly to keep old Thai women from being able to buy these awful clothes) for the 1000's of backpackers passing through. Most of who are traveling along for adventure and open to anything and anybody. So many people alone will strike up conversations with you and instantly there is a door open!
As I came to an opening a big empty cement area lay in the middle of the road. It didn't exactly have benches to sit on but there were numerous stone squares that could be used as benches. I took my seat and looked around. A huge golden spiral from the temple loomed in front of me - next to the colorful sparkles detailing the temple building. The street behind and in front of me was filled with people hurrying off to this place or that place. Hundreds of pigeons swarmed the area. I smiled at the male pigeons puffing themselves up dancing around the female. They ran away scared but the males kept chasing them so puffed up they looked ready to burst. I laughed remembering when I tried to explain to Titus that this is like women and men. Men fill their time with working out so they can puff themselves up in front of women but in all reality the women are scared of the dance and most times aren't impressed by the muscles....really it only impresses other men when they have big muscles.
I put my music in and breathlessly listen and prayed the words of these songs would be true for the Thai people. God of this City started playing and I remembered that it was in Bangkok that this song was written and sung out over the people at the concert. Deep in thought didn't see him come up until he was right in front me and sat down. He didn't really smile and I quickly realized he wasn't quite all there. His feet were dirty with the toenails molding. The face was worn with random long whiskers poking out this way and that. In his scrubby, unclean hands he held a pigeon. I looked at it and he gently offered me the bird to hold. He swayed back and forth a little...I didn't know whether to be stay or leave - he seemed a little crazy. Looking around the streets I noticed how many people were about and decided there was no way anything could happen, and that if it did, people would come to my rescue quickly...including the police just down the street watching traffic.
I sat there for a moment and turned to look at the man next to me. He was looking at his bird, cradled in my hands, with great joy. I realized he wasn't going to hurt me. I slowly took out my earphones and gave it to him. He didn't know what to do so I cautiously put the earphone around his ear and turned up the music. He smiled ever so slightly and said words I didn't understand but it sounded like he was trying to hum with the music. I prayed that the music would penetrate his soul. That God would supernaturally allow him to understand the words and find peace. Hear the name Jesus. For a long while we sat there in a dumpy, pigeon filled, empty cement area surrounded by chaos. But it was one of the most peaceful moments I can remember - it didn't seem like anything else was going on around us. I gave him back his pigeon and smiled at him. He walked with me for a little bit and then suddenly I realized he was gone. I don't know where he disappeared to but he was nowhere to be seen. I stood on the sidewalk and a smile came across my face. What a beautiful moment.
I didn't plan that moment. I didn't wake up and say, "I think I'l go find a homeless man and sit with him awhile". I didn't have a missionary or "contact" to help me, help people. God spoke this to me as I walked back, "you are waiting for somebody else to show you who to love. Those people you will be helping with missionaries are people who are already shown love. The child at the orphanage has a place to go and people working around her that love her. This man has nobody to love him or show him kindness. Love for people doesn't mean love for the people who you meet through missionaries, love for people means anybody you cross paths with". For the first time in my life I think I understood what Jesus meant when he said if you don't have love it all means nothing.
It didn't occur to me that perhaps this was exactly the spare moment we needed for God to teach us something. One morning I read for a long time and then prayed for a long time. It was one of those great moments were every verse comes alive and you know what you want to pray for. Impressed after sometime I took my ipod and went on a walk. I didn't know where to go - our area is filled with westerns and I wanted to get away and listen to some praise and worship while walking. I've been deeply longing that here but usually there is no place to hide away or it's not safe to venture alone. I started off in a direction I hadn't been before.
I walked along the street with out my ipod so I could listen to the sounds and make sure I didn't get hit while crossing the street. I found myself in the mist of allie ways filled with "old women" clothing. What I mean by that is fancy clothes old Thai women wear that look like it's from the late 80s. I felt compelled to pray that a church would rise up in that area (partly to keep old Thai women from being able to buy these awful clothes) for the 1000's of backpackers passing through. Most of who are traveling along for adventure and open to anything and anybody. So many people alone will strike up conversations with you and instantly there is a door open!
As I came to an opening a big empty cement area lay in the middle of the road. It didn't exactly have benches to sit on but there were numerous stone squares that could be used as benches. I took my seat and looked around. A huge golden spiral from the temple loomed in front of me - next to the colorful sparkles detailing the temple building. The street behind and in front of me was filled with people hurrying off to this place or that place. Hundreds of pigeons swarmed the area. I smiled at the male pigeons puffing themselves up dancing around the female. They ran away scared but the males kept chasing them so puffed up they looked ready to burst. I laughed remembering when I tried to explain to Titus that this is like women and men. Men fill their time with working out so they can puff themselves up in front of women but in all reality the women are scared of the dance and most times aren't impressed by the muscles....really it only impresses other men when they have big muscles.
I put my music in and breathlessly listen and prayed the words of these songs would be true for the Thai people. God of this City started playing and I remembered that it was in Bangkok that this song was written and sung out over the people at the concert. Deep in thought didn't see him come up until he was right in front me and sat down. He didn't really smile and I quickly realized he wasn't quite all there. His feet were dirty with the toenails molding. The face was worn with random long whiskers poking out this way and that. In his scrubby, unclean hands he held a pigeon. I looked at it and he gently offered me the bird to hold. He swayed back and forth a little...I didn't know whether to be stay or leave - he seemed a little crazy. Looking around the streets I noticed how many people were about and decided there was no way anything could happen, and that if it did, people would come to my rescue quickly...including the police just down the street watching traffic.
I sat there for a moment and turned to look at the man next to me. He was looking at his bird, cradled in my hands, with great joy. I realized he wasn't going to hurt me. I slowly took out my earphones and gave it to him. He didn't know what to do so I cautiously put the earphone around his ear and turned up the music. He smiled ever so slightly and said words I didn't understand but it sounded like he was trying to hum with the music. I prayed that the music would penetrate his soul. That God would supernaturally allow him to understand the words and find peace. Hear the name Jesus. For a long while we sat there in a dumpy, pigeon filled, empty cement area surrounded by chaos. But it was one of the most peaceful moments I can remember - it didn't seem like anything else was going on around us. I gave him back his pigeon and smiled at him. He walked with me for a little bit and then suddenly I realized he was gone. I don't know where he disappeared to but he was nowhere to be seen. I stood on the sidewalk and a smile came across my face. What a beautiful moment.
I didn't plan that moment. I didn't wake up and say, "I think I'l go find a homeless man and sit with him awhile". I didn't have a missionary or "contact" to help me, help people. God spoke this to me as I walked back, "you are waiting for somebody else to show you who to love. Those people you will be helping with missionaries are people who are already shown love. The child at the orphanage has a place to go and people working around her that love her. This man has nobody to love him or show him kindness. Love for people doesn't mean love for the people who you meet through missionaries, love for people means anybody you cross paths with". For the first time in my life I think I understood what Jesus meant when he said if you don't have love it all means nothing.
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